Aesthetic Dictatorship

   This got me into thinking once again that the art world is in itself ruled by the elites being part of the Worldly systems. Once, I've stepped inside the golden circle, I must be as wise as serpent yet gentle as a dove. I should be aware of my Christian values clashing against invented human standards. If you think science is the only one in-charge of distorting Biblical truth, the Art world is not far from it...an aesthetic dictatorship. 

   When people fail, there is a tendency to blame outside forces as automatic response for self-preservation....we don't want the last bits of our energy consumed also out of shame and dignity. Prohibited drug dependency can take over these unfulfilled fantasies...and on my case my smoking habit. Taking its toll now, perhaps of my system as I do feel deterioration inside and out. 
   I must rebuke this dependency on nicotine and on caffeine as well.
   
   My wife wanted me to look for other avenues to earn, as well as my son who sees that it take too long to create an income thru my passion. They still could not see my value as a contributor to the wholeness of the human spirit. Just like my mother and perhaps the same sentiment goes also between the families of my fellow artists. I've seen a lot of failures......and yet undying hopes. I pity my fellow artist as well. An advocacy perhaps on this area? Nah! I can't even barely make it on next day's feast. We get some, we lose a lot. 

   ...and yet, I'm still giving hope to newbies....