Fluctuations of An Artist

It's okay to be a struggling artist, what I fear is becoming a starving artist.  
   The only thing I know that I am capable of doing well isn't that stable. I better think of real job. What job? I way pass the hiring age now to be employed. As a self-employed by the way, I've tried various business venture....my main source of income isn't my art after all. 
   Yet, I don't want to work in a company any more...I've been there; done this and that. The bureaucracy isn't my turf. 

   You need to be happy at what you are doing...what if I'm not happy with my art anymore? Sometimes I feel it is not worth it....all this consuming passion is drained..withering.  






   I have to find ways and means to solve my financial issues and happiness factor....  perhaps making this miniature piece would at least sustain me. With regards to this stuff.... I was sad I can not fully express what I want to create. Making art that would guaranteed sale is kinda rudimentary and lessen the value of my work.  Yet my family need to survive and I have bills too. 
   Well there are party events occasionally where I was hired to paint faces. I'm fulfilled in that area.... for how long? 
    Commissions and portraiture? 

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