After Image, The Travel Inside My Visual Diaries

When my first official Visual Journal came one solemn night around 1995 I never thought I would make the hard decision to move away from the conventional wall intended paintings and settle to a longer and more time consuming passion. I transform the book "The Literal Colour" into "Realizationism, an artist journal"   from a sudden Realization as I turn my manuscript or collection into a laboratory of experiential learning using visual expression. 

   Prior to The Literal Colour, I had other scrapbook and portfolios whose intentions was to collect and make amends from my shortcomings. Also to solve the growing numbers of fire hazards in my room.  These other books are then incorporated into Realizationism...while others are either lost, given to friend, sold or taken by time and nature. I had this difficulty in giving away my work too...and that is another story. 

   Calling these books as visual manuscript or interchangeably journal or diary;  it has now grown into a mini library of its own. Now series 1 to 7 are mostly for my private pleasure and self-evaluation so very few people get the chance to see them. As I have said, Realizationism is my life time thesis therefore it may even take my entire existence before a single book get exhibited. These books also are ever evolving according to my state of being. 

FROM THE LAB TO THE NET

   I have been contemplating lately if I am ready to serve what I have been doing inside my laboratory. I would be needing another long long hours for this new project so I have to weigh all the matters if it is achievable. The private revelation aspect are not that easy to deal with since I am not a transparent person. Then I would be under obligation to keep an oath...I will have to stress my limit (and on my viewers part stretch their mind to my complex artworks) and yet I came to this acceptance from long ago that as an artist I have the  responsibility to the society I am mingling with. 

   The original intent of my visual journal are post-mortem analysis of my work and my life so meaning it should be concluded after death. My disambiguation. That would be keeping my agenda till the Lord decided to call me back.  It would be unfair to keep my friends guessing what are inside these journal or what are the process it undergo so I have to make AFTER IMAGE to answer in that direction. 

THE RE-CREATION

   First, a visual manuscript would either begin as a loose collection from previous artworks, then have the courage to tear them and make it as a collage item on the journal; and or a pre-fabricated book like sketch pad or hand-made bookbinding if you want to make it really more personal. Additional item should be  FOUND objects around you. Resourcefulness is a vital key in making a visual diary...it is important that everything on it must hold a special meaning to you, down to the tiniest detail. 

   You will understand the journey as I take you from nothingness as I begin my latest (eight) visual manuscript and hopefully by the Lord's grace will let me finish before the end comes. 

    The cover page as I have posted on facebook.com something like these: More than a week contemplating for the concept; about 3 hours thinking for a proper title, and an hour and half doing the cover...

   Inside this blog I would let you travel and work with me, if you wish, what is eating FherMission the self-proclaim visual artist. As to finally understand why I prefer that label than plainly calling myself as an "artist" and then maybe you can start creating your own and realized the health benefit it has been giving me. Recognized by psychologist and clinical science to relieved stress plus seeing the world in better perspective. Instead of stealing valuable energy from another human being...you can argue with yourself here and still feel safe as not to go insane.