More relax now as a painter, I don't pressure myself yet I'm more concentrated in hearing the voices of hues, shapes, and colors....especially now, a lot of texture.
You will one day realized that the Crying part of Life is essential. Rejoice in sorrow, because not everybody are given the chance to enter a divine realm where you can have a heart to heart talk with your Creator. Go ahead utter the spiritual language of pain and anguish to God...it has no words...word is not necessary....God is a Spirit and communicate through Feelings and Truth. Supplications that are hard to utter are often prayers that can not be refuse. "My God, My God, why has thou forsaken me Why art thou far from helping me, and from the words of my roaring?" -- Psalms 22:1